Kylie Blasts Off!

This innovation is totally going to take off!

Lawrence Corp have expressed interest in K/Y-L1 the hairdresser robot, although I’m in the process of looking through the contract and seeing what sort of changes they’d like to make to the concept. Apparently, they don’t like the ‘fake, blocky appearance’ and would like to transform it into a more humanoid form. Also, the voice is pretty much out, which is devastating. I thought the phrases were great fun!

It’s so much funding, though, and the chance to really take the concept to a new level. I’m just teaching Kylie to use Aveda hair products, because obviously. Melbourne hair salons using Aveda are totally killing it right now, what with their supposedly being the most environmentally friendly products on the market. They have a wind farm in America, apparently… what more do you want?

Once I get all the funding from Lawrence Corp and Kylie is mass-produced, I can open up a whole chain of hairdressing salons across Melbourne. I’ll call them… HairBot. 

No, wait… RoboTress.

No, that’s not right… Kylie. Yes, people will say, “Oh Carlita, where did you get your hair cut?” and Carlita will say, “At Kylie’s, my friend Tiffany. Amazing service, great conversation, affordable prices and everything is automated. And if you go in for five cuts, a roomba waiter brings you a free frozen yoghurt!”

This may end up costing me quite a lot in roombas and frozen yoghurt. Maybe I’ll make it every eighth cut. But the overall principle will be the same: you come to Kylie’s for the best of every single world, from value to getting to see cool robots. Maybe one day, people will come to my St James Place hair salon. Book appointments, I shall say, and they shall oblige! There’ll be haircut robots, stylist robots, blow wave robots and even sweeping-hair-up-off-the-floor robots! What a lovely dream.

First, I would like to know why L-Corp wants to know all the inner workings AND if I have any next of kin, though.

-Mortin